Intimacy--Feeling Close and Connected

A frequent complaint I hear in couples counseling is, "We don't feel close anymore. We just feel like roommates." Often this means there is a lack of intimacy, not necessary sexually, but more often emotional intimacy is missing. If you could observe, like a fly on the wall, the lives of couples who report they feel close and connected you would find that they engage in certain things that create intimacy.


General Principles of Intimacy

1. People who are intimate spend time together.
2. People who are intimate talk about vulnerable feelings, hopes, and dreams.
3. People who are intimate touch each other a fair amount.
4 Men and women often have different ideas about creates intimacy.
5. People who are intimate do thoughtful actions for each other — “grants” of daily loving behavior.
6. People who continue to stay intimate over the years have learned to be very specific about what they want and need from their partner.
7. Intimacy can only occur in an atmosphere of trust.

If you don't feel close and connected to your partner, an intimacy issue may be getting in the way. If you would like more information about how to work on these issues, you can reach me at 512-795-0402 or on my website www.mariposapsychotherapy.com